“We got left here. Boss brought only you. I’m just a hand-me-down. Boss’s cousin used to wear me everywhere! I want a chance to be worn again.”
PURPLE, purple shirt, 9 years old
SNAKES, snakes shirt, 10 years old
STAR WARS, star wars shirt, 11 years old
Actors should wear oversized t-shirts.
SETTING: behind a dresser in a bedroom
PURPLE is behind the dresser.
Boss wore me again! He loves me!
STAR WARS enters.
For the 1,000,000th time and counting.
What do you mean?
Don’t play dumb with me!
PURPLE runs towards STAR WARS.
STAR WARS gets out of the way.
Whoa, easy now.
But PURPLE is on a roll.
But PURPLE keeps running, and runs off…
SNAKES suddenly turns around
You know, he used to wear me.
Oh no! Winter break is starting soon!
STAR WARS and SNAKES
Oh yess, coming soon is winter breeak
Boss and Purple will be skating on a frozen lake
Oh no. We won’t go. So sad.
I’m mad. Not glad.
STAR WARS and SNAKES look at their watches and then look up.
It’s in two minutes and 45 seconds!
PURPLE runs on.
Ahh, back from winter break.
We got left here. Boss brought only you. I’m just a hand-me-down. Boss’s cousin used to wear me everywhere! I want a chance to be worn again.
He used to go swimming with me, I’d get all wet and then I’d get to go on the great big amusement park ride… known as the… WASHING MACHINE!
You’d think Boss would have chosen MULTIPLE CLOTHING CHOICES!
He did! He brought Mr. Socks and the Jeans!
I mean multiple shirt choices.
In yo face!
I don’t even have a face.
We have to do ssssomething about Purple.
Boss got this new Dash Robot.
They whisper-form a plan.
Dassssh is sssso heavy, he’ll get sssstuck under him!
SNAKES and STAR WARS run and hide in the corner.
PURPLE dances back on while singing.
Oh, Boss always wears me. Oh, life is so fine.
Oh, I’m his favorite everytime.
Oh, yeah! It’s an honor. Life is so good.
I’m not a jacket, so I don’t have a hood.
SNAKES leaps out of the corner holding Dash. Dash is a little toy robot.
SNAKES covers PURPLE with Dash.
STAR WARS comes in and they run off stage.
SNAKES get shoved back into the room.
Boss is wearing me!
STAR WARS runs off.
Grow me hands, self.
PURPLE grows hands.
PURPLE pushes Dash the Robot off and runs off stage.
STAR WARS enters. SNAKES too. They seem to be discussing something.
Boss wore Purple again. He can’t stop like Palpatine can’t stop the good guys from winning.
Carmina Burana plays.
Actually I’m tired of doing it, but it’s an honor.
Please stop. Please stop. Please stop.
SNAKES sings “To be Worn”
Oh, I wish that I, me, finally,
Would be worn! Yes I know!
Purple is better but so am I!
I want to be worn in every weather.
To be worn. It would be an honor.
Yesss it would, oh it would.
No, yes, a schedule. Amazing.
To be worn! yeah!!!
So, yeah, we got a schedule.
And Boss likes us equally.
So that’s it. The end!
Voice from behind the scenes:
Hi, I’m the new orange shirt. Boss loves me.
End of Play