Bob and Bobby the Weirdos

by Tunca Altintepe
Bob and Bobby the Weirdos Tunca loves sports. He is in third grade and is nine years old.

“One day Bob woke up and went to the bathroom, so he could brush his teeth. When he finished brushing, his mom called him for breakfast. It was eggs breakfast. When Bob looked at the news, he saw that a bank was robbed. When he finished his breakfast, he went to his friend Bobby’s house to tell him what happened and asked him to help him find the robber.”

One day Bob woke up and went to the bathroom, so he could brush his teeth. When he finished brushing, his mom called him for breakfast. It was eggs breakfast. When Bob looked at the news, he saw that a bank was robbed. When he finished his breakfast, he went to his friend Bobby’s house to tell him what happened and asked him to help him find the robber.

Bobby said, “Sure.”

So, they took Bobby’s dad’s car and drove it without a driver’s license. They had multiple crashes, but they ended up where they wanted to be, with twenty-seven scratches. They arrived in twenty days because they crashed twenty-seven times, but they were there. The bank was twenty miles away from Bob’s house.

“Where to?” said Bobby. “Are we gonna look for the criminal?”

“No, we’re gonna go to Wolfgang Steakhouse! I just lost my head a little bit over there,” Bob said.

“Now I think we have to head to the bank,” said Bobby.

“Yes,” said Bob. “Time to go back to my house.”

“What?” said Bobby.

“I only came here to have a good thinking spot for the plan,” said Bob.

“This is the loudest place in the town,” Bobby said. “Because there’s a lot of traffic.”

“Time to walk back to the house,” said Bob.

“You’re annoying, Bob!” Bobby told Bob as they walked towards Australia to rent a car there.

They put the car in a plane, and they got arrested because you’re not allowed to put a car in a plane. But luckily, the jail was right next to Bobby’s house. And they were happy. And sad that they wasted tons of money for two cars and a first class plane. But luckily, Bob and Bobby were going to jail next to Bobby’s house.

When Bob and Bobby arrived, they sat in the jail cell. Bobby had an idea. His idea was to steal a police officer’s clothes, and since Bob and Bobby are both nine, Bob got on top of Bobby’s shoulders because Bobby is stronger than Bob. Then, Bobby wore the police’s pants. Then, Bob wore his shirt, and they took the key out of the big police pants. Then they got out of the jail cell and walked one mile an hour out of jail. Next, they went back to Bobby’s parents’ house and stole the other car. Then, Bob asked Bobby if he got the plan.

And then, Bobby said, “Probably.”

Next, Bob said, “Good.”

And then they did as the plan said. When they got out, they went to the car. The first part was perfect, but they forgot to take off their police suit, and then fell at the front door and broke the window. Next, they took off the police suit and got the car. But the garage door closed behind them, so when they got in the car, they started driving and smashed into the garage door and drove through it. The car’s lamps broke severely. And by accident they drove to New Zealand. When they realized that they were in New Zealand, they actually drove to the bank. Then, they saw the robber and a Wolfgang restaurant. But instead they went to the Wolfgang restaurant And Bobby went mad and ran all the way back to his own house. Bob was wishing for that to happen.

Bob was very happy. Now he could have steak without a non stop talker with very bad temper.

“Sir! Sir! Sir!!!” It was the waiter asking for the order, and Bob was daydreaming. Bobby was right next to Bob shaking him to wake him up.

“Cghdyetrpon?” said Bob.

“May I take your order?” said the waiter.

“Huh,” said Bob. “Me want steek.”

“One steek coming up,” said the waiter.

“No!” said Bob. “I want my food to come down, not up!”

“Okay okay okay,” said the waiter.

Thirty minutes later, the food came and the food was soup. But it was supposed to be steak.

Bob was sleeping, so he said, “Steek.” On the menu there was steek soup, so they thought that he wanted soup. Then, Bob sued the waiter immediately and walked out with a one hundred dollar bill.

He tried to be generous to the other tables that sat there and didn’t do anything, so he left the bill there. Then, the waiter took the bill back. Then, Bob and Bobby left and sat inside of the car. Bob turned on the wheel, and they started for home. They got into twenty-five car crashes, and then Bobby called Bob so forgetful because they forgot to stop the robber. Then, they took the same car they crashed and went slower than walking speed. They arrived with zero crashes because they were going so slow. Then when they arrived at the bank, they saw footsteps going one way. It was a fork in the road, so they chose to follow the footsteps. But the robber had put the footsteps there, so they would follow that path.

“This can only mean one thing,” Bob said. “We go the other way.”

They walked the other way, and then they saw a fifty dollar bill on the other road. So they picked it up and walked that way because that was probably where the robber was since he dropped the money.

“At least we got half of the money back!” Bob said and he put it in the bank because the bank never moved and to return some of the money the robber stole.

Then, they continued walking on that road which led into a driveway. They didn’t notice, so they kept walking, and Bobby got hit by a car. He got a concussion and broke his back, so they had to go back home on foot.

Three months later, they arrived bruised and barely breathing. Then, they went to the hospital, and Bobby got a lot of casts and wasn’t allowed to walk for another week, but he wasn’t going to die. Bob was sad, and Bobby was happy. Bob was upset that Bobby didn’t die because Bobby didn’t behave well on their vacation. So, Bob went alone while Bobby couldn’t walk. He walked and walked and walked, but soon he figured out that he wasn’t at the bank, he was in Hawaii.

“At least it’s not as bad as when I was in Australia, but it’s still really bad,” said Bob.

When he came back to New York, he bought a car, but sadly the car shop was right next to the bank, so he wasted all his money, and now he was broke. He didn’t get a receipt, so he couldn’t return the car. At least I got a new car for the family, he thought. But he was daydreaming and crashed the car into the bank. He tried to sue the guy that sold the car, but he couldn’t because it was his own fault. So, he couldn’t sue. So, he walked into the bank through the hole he made in the wall.

He saw the broken money holders inside the bank that the robber broke open. The robbery was over a year ago, so Bob was now ten. He was smarter now, so he followed the old money path which was actually a twenty-six mile loop. So then he followed the highway.

He was going to do anything to find food. At least he found Burger King. He tried to go inside, but it was shut down. So, he had to continue his road to the robber. Bob was exhausted. He wished that he had brought Bobby with him. Then, he saw Bobby right behind him. He looked even more exhausted than him and was wearing a ripped pillow case. He said that he broke out of the hospital, and the hospital dogs attacked him. He managed to outsmart them by making them slam into a wall. But while he was doing this, he was attacked, but he ran away. So. they broke inside the Burger King and ate all their food. Then when Bobby came out, he looked at Bob.

“You’re as big as a balloon,” Bobby said.

Bob agreed and tried to run, but he toppled over. He bruised his arm. Then, Bobby saw something. It was a person in a black ski mask. It was the robber. Bobby tried to catch up to him, but the robber was too fast, and Bobby ate too much, so he toppled over too. Bob and Bobby couldn’t get up, so they had to roll wherever they went.

Finally, they got to the wall and were able to get up. Then, they both threw up and lost all their weight. They ran the way the robber went. They finally saw the robber pickpocketing someone at a five star restaurant. Bob was just about to tackle him, but the robber took the guy he stole the wallet from, so instead Bob tackled the innocent person. Bob asked him what his name was and said sorry, and then ran after the robber with Bobby. Then, they saw the police. The robber pulled Bob to the side and put his ski mask on his head and gave the money to Bob. Then, the police thought that Bob was the robber.

Then, the guy that the robber pickpocketed said, “No, it’s not Bob. It’s someone else.”

They found the robber, and luckily the police were faster than the robber, and they caught him.

“Finally! It was an exhausting year, but we finally caught him,” said Bob.

Finally, Bob got to ride in a car with a good driver, and the police didn’t let him sit in the front seat. Bob and Bobby were put into jail because they broke out last time. They were there for two months and had a great time in jail. There was Wi-Fi, so they got to do everything they wanted to do on their electronics. And the food service was much better than at Wolfgang. They didn’t deserve to be sued.

“This is perfect,” Bob told Bobby.

“Yeah,” said Bobby. “I’ve never had an experience better than this one.”

“I love jail,” said Bob. “We should ask for an extra night.”

“Yeah. But sadly my parents are screaming outside for me, so I don’t think that can happen,” said Bobby.

When the two months were over, they were released, and they both went home with their parents. But when Bob got home, it turned out that his parents were at Wolfgang, and Bob walked all the way there on his bare feet. The moment he got there, his mom spanked him so many times because he crashed their cars and the Lamborghini. They had to sell all their property for more money and gave the money to Bobby’s parents so that they could make fun for all of them. They also built a new part of Bobby’s house to make the house bigger. But sadly, there was no Wi-Fi in Bobby’s house, so they stretched the Wi-Fi closer to their house. Then, Bob and Bobby got their Xboxes and played. After five hours of screen time, they finally left the TV.

Then, they saw the robber’s son outside the door looking for his dad in jail. So, Bob and Bobby picked up the baby and walked all the way to jail and threw him into the cell with a bottle of milk. Then, they bought a toy car for their house to learn how to drive. They were no better than they were in a real car. They bumped into everything and broke a vase and turned over tables in three minutes.

“This isn’t the worst we’ve done. Remember the Lamborghini?” said Bob. “We wasted so much money.”

While they were walking home, Bob saw his new best friend on the street. Because Bobby wasn’t his friend anymore, he was his brother because they lived in the same house. Bobby asked Bob’s mom what was dinner.

Bob’s mom said, “We’re going to Wolfgang restaurant.”

Bob said, “No way, I’m never going there. I sued them.”

“Too bad,” Bob’s mom said. “But this time instead of walking, we’re going in a taxi.”

When they arrived, the same waiter they sued was serving them. Bob and Bobby ran all the way home screaming. They ran into the bathroom and locked the door. The waiter did the same thing. All the parents sued the restaurant and walked home.

Wolfgang and their home were eighteen miles apart. They were exhausted when they got home and asked Bob and Bobby how they walked almost one hundred and fifty miles nonstop.

Bob said, “You just need a person with you who always wears a ripped pillow case for a shirt.” Then, Bobby’s mom glared at him. Bob said, “Sorry.”

Then, Bobby gave him a slap on the back, and they roasted chicken wings with bbq sauce, french fries, and mashed potatoes. They had salad for an appetizer. Bob and Bobby were so hungry that they gobbled everything down at the speed of sound.

Then Bob said, “Do you think we’ll do this again?”

“I don’t know,” Bobby said, and everyone laughed.

 

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