Alaskabama

Hannah Diker
Alaskabama Hi! My name is Hannah and I write mainly stories but I wanted to try writing a screenplay. It turned out amazing! I also like to go swimming and play basketball. My favorite word is banana because it can go on and on.

“It says Alaska wants to be first in the United States alphabetical order, so it’s started a war with Alabama. It also says that the war won’t start for another month, but they are still recruiting more soldiers and the families are missing their dads and husbands.”

            

FADE IN:

GRAND CENTRAL STATION – EVENING

People are clearing out at the end of the day.

Behind Great Clock. Three teens, KAYLA, ALEXANDER, and REX, are sitting on the floor talking. The boys share a room because there are only two rooms, and KAYLA, the girl, wants privacy. At night it is cold, big, and empty. The three love going to the Central Terminal and looking up at the beautiful ceiling.

CHILDHOOD HOME (Flashback)

The children’s FATHER is holding two baby boys and talking to KAYLA, who is a toddler.

FATHER

Your mom is dead.

REX

Daddy, I just went poopy.

FATHER

Ugh. (FATHER tries to change diaper, but fails and storms out of the room while REX starts crying. He gives them to the cities orphanage.)

ORPHANAGE STEPS

(FATHER leaves children on steps.)

INSIDE ORPHANAGE (Four Years Later)

ALEXANDER hides a jelly bomb and it explodes all over the teacher. After, all three of them were purposefully left on a field trip to the Grand Central Station.

HELPER

You guys wait here. We’ll be back to get you in a few minutes.

TWENTY MINUTES LATER

ALEXANDER

Where are they?

KAYLA

You dumbo, they left us!

KAYLA’S ROOM

KAYLA is changing in one of the rooms. This room is the smaller one, and also the one that has the great big clock. On the right side of what they call the bed there is the door. KAYLA has her back turned to it when she hears a sound of footsteps. She turns around just in time to see the boys walking in. This is what happens.

KAYLA

GET OUT OF MY ROOM YOU BOYS, I’M CHANGING!

REX

Sorry, we didn’t know.

KAYLA

Yes you did.

REX

No.

KAYLA

Yes.

REX

No.

KAYLA

Yes.

Meanwhile, ALEXANDER is hiding a jelly bomb in her closet, the same type he had set off in the orphanage. KAYLA smells it and storms into the closet but it still explodes all over her and the boys run out.

CUT TO: KAYLA, REX, and ALEXANDER sitting on the floor, thinking. After about 13min and 30sec. a newspaper flies in.

REX

What’s this?

KAYLA

It’s a newspaper.

ALEXANDER

Know your facts.

KAYLA

See? Even Alexander knows what it is, and he’s do ––

ALEXANDER

Don’t say it. I’m working on it.

KAYLA

No, you’re working on jelly bombs.

ALEXANDER

Whatever.

KAYLA

Anyway back to the newspaper, look at this. It says Alaska wants to be first in the United States alphabetical order, so it’s started a war with Alabama. It also says that the war won’t start for another month but they are still recruiting more soldiers and the families are missing their dads and husbands. But no other states are affected by this.

REX

Guys, this might be our chance to make peace, and if we do, we will be famous and get rich.

ALEXANDER

I’ll get a car and a cotton candy machine.

REX

Let’s buy a mansion.

(KAYLA ushers the boys into their room. In their room, the two boys lay on the floor with one blanket each. They talk thoughtfully.)

NARRATOR (V.O.)

That night the boys were thinking thoughtfully, as they rarely do.

ALEXANDER

Kayla didn’t look happy today.

REX

Well, we did do some mean stuff.

ALEXANDER

We always act like that.

REX

I guess she is getting tired of it.

ALEXANDER

Do you think if we listened to her, she would have good ideas?

REX

Maybe, but I was getting tired.

ALEXANDER

We should treat her better.

CUT TO: KAYLA’S ROOM. KAYLA lies in her room, thinking about the same reason as her brothers.

KAYLA

We used to have fun together, but now all we do is yell and have arguments. I wish Dad was here. He would help, but they don’t appreciate Dad just because they don’t remember him.

CUT TO: The next day. KAYLA, REX, and ALEXANDER sit in the boys room.

KAYLA

Where’d you guys get that cake we had for breakfast anyway?

FLASHBACK TO: That morning. ALEXANDER and REX grab a cake that was dropped by a little girl who started crying when her mom stated that she could not pick it up because it had fallen.

REX AND ALEXANDER

Nowhere.

KAYLA

Oh really?

REX

Okay fine, we saw the girl drop it and we picked it up.

KAYLA

At least it was good. Okay, let’s stop talking about cake, and start talking about the war.

ALEXANDER

You started talking about cake.

KAYLA

No one needs to know that. How are we going to stop the war?

ALEXANDER

We could go in groups.

KAYLA

Wow, you have been getting smarter.

REX

No, you haven’t.

ALEXANDER

Yes, I have.

REX

No.

ALEXANDER

Yes.

KAYLA

STOP ARGUING, that’s all we do. I don’t like it.

REX

You are right, we used to laugh and have fun. I was thinking about that last night.

KAYLA

Me too!

REX

I guess we are siblings.

KAYLA

You doubted that?

REX

Well, no.

(REX, KAYLA, and ALEXANDER all laugh like they used to.)

CUT TO: INSIDE OF KAYLA, REX, and ALEXANDER, where a small bubble pops.

NARRATOR (V.O.)

Inside each of the kids, a bubble pops, the one that had been waiting for this moment.

CUT TO: KAYLA, ALEXANDER, and REX crawling through the vent to get to the CENTRAL TERMINAL to look for lunch.

ALEXANDER

We need to make this bigger. It was fine when we were little.

KAYLA

Exactly.

REX

Look, a train to Alabama leaves in 30 minutes and I have a good plan. Listen. Kayla could take that train and talk with the governor of Alabama ask him to change the name from Alabama to Alaskabama, meanwhile Alexander and I will be in Alaska doing the same, and maybe make a compromise.

KAYLA

Great, let’s get some food so I can get on the train.

ALEXANDER

Look, a man. His paper bag has ripped. Let’s see what’s dropping from it.

THE TRAIN

Narrator (V.O.)

After having had a not-so-delicious breakfast Kayla was sitting on the train, minding her own business.

CONDUCTOR

This stop is Savannah, Georgia.

On the train, a few people get on but one that doesn’t fit in it is a man, about seven feet tall, and looking mad, very mad. He is bald and has ginormous hands. KAYLA is sitting in one of the two seaters and he decides to sit right next to her. He breathes heavily and his breath doesn’t smell good.

CUT TO: KAYLA daydreams about moving or staying where she is.

CUT TO: KAYLA gets up and moves.

MAN

Why did you move away from me? I am now the boss here, so you must do as I say. Ahh, this feels so nice. I have always wanted to be the head of something and order people around.

KAYLA

Well I’m sorry, but I don’t think that has come true.

(The MAN is close to hitting her but she ducks just in time. The next stop is coming up.)

We can push him off the train, but you guys have to help me.

PEOPLE IN CROWD

Okay.

CONDUCTOR

This stop is Louisiana.

When the doors open, PEOPLE IN CROWD use all their might to push him out.

CUT TO: KAYLA in the GOVERNOR’S OFFICE.

GOVERNOR

Go, quick, I have a meeting in five minutes to talk about battle strategies for the war.

KAYLA

Only five minutes to change his mind, this will be fun.

GOVERNOR

What do you want?

KAYLA

I want to stop the war.

GOVERNOR

We didn’t start it.

KAYLA

I know that, but you could change your name to Alaskabama and they could too so you would both be first.

GOVERNOR

But we were supposed to be first in the first place.

KAYLA

And there was not supposed to be a war.

GOVERNOR

Fine. CANCEL THE MEETING. I WANT ANOTHER MEETING TO CHANGE THE NAME OF THIS STATE.

KAYLA

Wow, that was easy.

In the CENTRAL TERMINAL, ALEXANDER and REX are asking when the next time an Alaska train is leaving. It is crowded, about midday, and a MAN comes up. It is the same man who was on KAYLA’S train.

MAN

Move it.

ALEXANDER

No, we are staying right where we are.

MAN

Suites me, but I don’t think you will be standing.

REX

Whoa, them’s fighting words.

(The MAN starts to punch ALEXANDER but he catches the punch and pushes it away from them.)

REX

Wow, I didn’t know you could do that.

ALEXANDER

Neither did I.

CUT TO: REX and ALEXANDER at THE HARBOR

REX

Look, a sail boat. We could sneak onto that.

ALEXANDER

But on a big boat, it would be hard to catch us.

REX

Exactly. On the sailboat, no one will be there to catch.

ALEXANDER

Ohhh.

ON BOAT

REX

I will die if I don’t get food soon.

ALEXANDER

Same here.

ALASKA’S GOVERNOR’S HOUSE

We see REX and ALEXANDER eating at a dinner table.

REX

We want to stop the war!

GOVERNOR

I know, you’ve said that a million times.

ALEXANDER

Who gave you the idea of the war or did you just think of it?

GOVERNOR

Oh. A seven-foot-tall man who had ginormous hands and was bald told me I should do the war.

REX

That man loves violence, doesn’t he?

ALEXANDER

He sure does, but we need to find him!

REX

Last time we saw him, he was in the Grand Central Station. He couldn’t have gone far.

GOVERNOR

I can call Grand Central! They’ll give me the security camera footage.

ALEXANDER

Really???

REX

Yeah, he’s the governor!

GOVERNOR

(Meanwhile, the GOVERNOR is on the phone asking for the security cameras from the head of the station. On screen, we see the GOVERNOR on one side and TODD on the other.) (On telephone) Hello Todd! How is life running Grand Central Station?

TODD

Oh, great. Can I do you a favor?

GOVERNOR

Can you give me the security cameras from two days ago?

TODD

Anytime. I’ll send them right over.

(TODD and the GOVERNOR hang up.)

CUT TO: REX, ALEXANDER, and the GOVERNOR sitting around the television watching the footage.

REX

Oh look! There we are. And he’s coming over.

ALEXANDER

Watch my amazing fighting skills.

REX

Hey where is he going? It looks like to track four! What’s leaving from track four?

ALEXANDER

The train to go to Alaska. Oh no! He’s coming!

MAN

(Suddenly, the door creaks open and they hear the MAN walk in.) What are you kids doing?

REX

We’re stopping the war that you started.

ALEXANDER

(As the MAN and the boys talk, the GOVERNOR begins to slowly creep out of the room but ALEXANDER grabs him.) No! You agreed to this. You’re staying. (ALEXANDER turns his attention to the MAN.) Why do you like violence anyway?

MAN

That’s all my mother and my father did. I was given away to the orphanage because my parents couldn’t take care of me anymore.

ALEXANDER

But shouldn’t that make you against violence? We’re orphans too, and we’re definitely against violence because that’s how our mom died.

MAN

I guess I don’t know what I was thinking.

REX

Well, could you help us stop the war?

MAN

Sure! What could I do?

(Suddenly, the door opens again and KAYLA comes in.)   

KAYLA

We have to change this state’s name to Alaskabama!

GOVERNOR

But why?

KAYLA

Because Alabama’s doing it and that’s the only way you guys will be tied for first.

GOVERNOR

Okay, I’ll set up a meeting.

MAN

I want to do something to help!

GOVERNOR

Why don’t you come to the meeting?

KAYLA

What about us? Could we come?

GOVERNOR

The more, the better!

KAYLA

Alright! Where is it?

GOVERNOR

(GOVERNOR pulls over ALEXANDER to the side.) Who is that?

ALEXANDER

Oh! Our sister.

GOVERNOR

Do you guys have some place to go to, or do you want to stay here?

KAYLA

Oh, we’ll stay here.

CUT TO: AT THE MEETING

GOVERNOR

So the decision is decided! We are changing the state to  Alaskabama!  

CUT TO: BEHIND THE CLOCK
ALEXANDER, REX, and KAYLA are back at home, hanging out.

KAYLA

What an adventure that was!

REX

I know! Some people do that every day.

ALEXANDER

I really don’t believe that.

KAYLA

Me neither.

REX

I know. Because it’s a lie.

(They all laugh.)

FADE OUT

THE END

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