“Once upon a time, there was a terrrerian that consumed stars. The terrrerian consumed stars by piling dirt up until he was at the stars. Then, he ate the stars after they fell from the sky.”
Once upon a time, there was a terrrerian that consumed stars. The terrrerian consumed stars by piling dirt up until he was at the stars. Then, he ate the stars after they fell from the sky. To get down from the dirt mountain, he flew from tree to tree until he found maple syrup. Then, he boiled the maple syrup to make sand. He used the sand in a mixifier with stone, and he got sandstone. He ate the sandstone, and then jumped from the mountain and landed safely.
He used the extra sandstone to greenify the hooligans that were smashing the buzzlight bottles, that were made by the magical buzzlight fairy, who made the buzzlight company. When the terrrerian greenified the hooligans, they turned green and stopped moving. The buzzlight fairy was very happy, so the terrrerian got a bunch of green bobbleheads that yelled at greenery. The bobbleheads were magical, so they could grant wishes. But, when the bobbleheads granted wishes, the bobbleheads yelled even more at the greenery, which would make the greenery sad. The greenery would cry, which made the greenery grow. When the greenery grew the bobbleheads evaporated slowly till there were no bobbleheads left. The greenery somehow had magic powers because the greenery absorbed the bobbleheads.The bobbleheads reproduced because one bobblehead refused to grant wishes, and then there were 100 bobbleheads again.The terrrerian accidentally wished that he had an obsidian skull, and then he got his face stuck in a skull made of sponge marshmallows. The terrrerian wished the skull off his face and wished for a walnut salad, but when he ate the walnut salad he turned blue. Luckily, he had one wish left, so he wished that he was back to normal again.
But then there were no bobbleheads left. He still had some walnut salad left, so he fed it to the stars, and the stars fell all the way down to earth. Then the earth dissolved and became a star planet. He jumped off the star planet and turned it into a huge sponge marshmallow that broke gravity. He made three-dimensional televisions, took them to the sponge marshmallow planet, and ate them.
When he ate the three-dimensional TVs he could travel into the three dimensions. Then he traveled into the world of Potonia and bought a reversal potion. Then he travelled back into his own dimension. He threw the reversal potion at the sponge marshmallow planet, and it turned into a regular planet. He jumped back down to his planet and realized that the hooligans that were smashing the buzzlight bottles. They were still smashing them because they were ungreenified.
The buzzlight fairy was really angry, so she tried to destroy Jupiter, but instead she turned Jupiter into a firecracker. The firecracker exploded into the sun, which sent the whole galaxy hurtling into space.The galaxy crashed into a humongous spiderweb and there was a galaxy-wide spider apocalypse. But the spiders were peace loving creatures, and said that they would forgive the humans if they made it illegal to hurt a spider. Then the humans outlawed hurting a spider and outlawed spider farming. The humans were happy living in a world with spiders. Everyone had no fear because the spiders would protect them.
People, and he subliminally messaged everyone to eat carrots. When everyone ate the carrots, they had super eyesight. The terrrerian still needed to remove the hooligans that kept smashing the buzzlight bottles, so he ran around the earth really fast, and that turned the earth into a super-friction planet, which only a few creatures would not survive. One of those creatures were the buzzlight-bottle-smashing-hooligans. After that, the buzzlight fairy was happy, so she gave the terrrerian time in a can. When the terrrerian opened the time in a can, there was a potent poultry powered popcorn machine that exploded exactly every elephant Ecuador ever executed. Then there was a worldwide Ecuador-executed elephant deficiency, which started a nuclear fallout. Because of the fallout, the spiders started spewing superheated spasm gas. The gas disabled the nuclear fallout by personifying it and sending it on a trip in its favorite rocket ship.The only side effects of the superheated spasm gas is that baby chickens turned green, and all the spiders shrunk again.
When the terrrerian saw the green chickens he thought he had greenified them by accident. So he fed all the baby chickens his spare walnut salad, and the baby chickens turned yellow again. The unbalance of color was balanced, so everything that was green turned yellow. The terrrerian realized that he didn’t greenify the baby chickens, and they were green before. Then, thanks to the transdimensional televisions, the terrrerian totally consumed, he transported himself into the rainbowredorangeyellowgreenblueindigoviolet dimension.
In the rainbowredorangeyellowgreenblueindigoviolet dimension, everything was rainbowredorangeyellowgreenblueindigoviolet. In the dimension, the terrrerian went into the color utility store and was going to buy a color unbalancer, but when the terrrerian walked in, he saw that a thief stole all the color unbalancers. Then everything in the rainbowredorangeyellowgreenblueindigoviolet dimention turned green because color spectrum looked like this: rainbowredorangeyellowgreenblueindigoviolet instead of this: rainbowredorangeyellowgreenblueindigoviolet. Because green was the same in both spectrums, the rainbowredorangeyellowgreenblueindigoviolet dimension turned green. Then the terrrerian bought a cannon and it hit the thief.
The terrrerian then put the color unbalancers back, and then got one for free because he got the color unbalancers back. Then the terrrerian went back home and used the color unbalancer. Then the color was unbalanced again. One side effect of the color unbalancer was that the hooligans were ungreenified, so they were yelllowified. Yellowifing something made it faster, stronger, and greenify resistant. When the terrrerian tried to greenify the hooligans they just smashed the buzzlight bottles faster. So, the terrrerian used a purplify potion to normalify the hooligans, and then the terrrerian greenified the hooligans using a green explosion.Then the terrrerian was hungry again. The terrrerian destroyed all of the stars near earth and destroyed Jupiter, so he visited buyyourownstar.com and bought a star,but the shipping was $100,000,000,000,000,000. The terrrerian called Subway Steve and asked him to come to the terrrerian. Then Subway Steve came and the terrrerian rode him to planet with a realy confusing name: hfdjmzcnjnbvmcfk,l.kjhnmlkdfgjfkvlijbnndmgjbrn gnkhb5rilkfnghnktuhbnjhutjhutktjnbjknufmjrknvbtmbnhjkvthukbtnjkukidvmnkbktjhbvgrjnvnjxjkrmthn, AKA Planet 9.
The terrrerian went to planet 9 to get the star, but they ran out of stars, so the terrrerian used a crazily confuddled corn cob powered cod liver oil cannon to shoot cod liver oil at a star. Then the star was supercharged and spun to Earth. The terrrerian walked to earth and saw that the hooligans were ungreenified. The terrrerian realized that greenifying the hooligans wouldn’t do anything, so the terrrerian created a giant Buzzlight bottle and sent the hooligans to it. The hooligans stayed there and never bothered the buzzlight fairy again.
Or did they…?
The Buzzlight Fairy was just minding her own business, drinking a cup of tea and watching buzzlight-bottles network. Suddenly she felt a massive pain in her side. She dropped her tea on the floor and the china shattered. This was no ordinary pain. It was as if a thousand knives appeared in her side. Suddenly the pain stopped. The Buzzlight Fairy then envisioned a being with immense capabilities, known as “the terrrerian”, creating a massive buzzlight bottle in place of Jupiter, which had been destroyed. She then saw the being place four hooligans on the planet who started smashing it immediately. The Buzzlight fairy became frustrated. Why would one make such a beautiful thing only to have it destroyed? It was then when the Buzzlight fairy swore she would get revenge against this being.
The terrrerian smiled gleefully as he saw the hooligans smashing the buzzlight bottle,without paying the slightest bit of attention to the buzzlight bottle that the terrrerian was holding. Then the ground started to shake as bits of the buzzlight bottle rose into the air. A blinding ball of light appeared. As the light faded,the terrrerian saw a fairy whose eyes were flaming. The buzzlight fairy.
“The buzzlight bottles you’ve destroyed. That you’ve sacrificed to the void. You must stop destroying them tonight or else your soul will take flight,” the buzzlight fairy said cryptically before disappearing in a ball of light.
The terrrerian then took the hooligans in a net and moved them to MarZ. On MarZ, there was zombies everywhere.When the terrrerian dropped off the hooligans off on MarZ, he expected the hooligans to get zombified, but they turned the zombies into Buzzlight Bottles! It turns out that the hooligans absorbed the magical powers from the bobbleheads, like the greenery, in The Terrrerian. Now the hooligans could turn anything they wanted into buzzlight bottles and smash them! The terrrerian tried to talk to the hooligans and asked them to stop smashing buzzlight bottles. All the hooligans said was “rfgfhtvfdzycuy,” and they walked away. Then the terrrerian felt a pulling force, like a vortex. A ball of light flickered to life and started to expand.Then it faded away and the buzzlight fairy hovered in its place.
“Hello, terrrerian. Now before you say anything, I must ask you; why did you make a giant buzzlight bottle just to have it destroyed?”
“I didn’t know that you existed before. If I knew, I never would have made it. I tried to stop the hooligans, but apparently they can turn anything they want into buzzlight bottles,” the terrrerian telecommunicated
“Can they turn each other into buzzlight bottles?” inquired the buzzlight fairy.
“I don’t know.”
The terrrerian then flew to MarZ. He took the hooligans to the nearest planet that didn’t turn into a firecracker and explode, SaTURN. On SaTURN everyone fell sideways.The terrrerian placed the hooligans in a small room and hoped the hooligans would turn each other into buzzlight bottles. What the terrrerian didn’t know, is that they placed the hooligans above the six percent helium that was on Jupiter. The hooligans turned the room into a buzzlight bottle and escaped. Before the terrrerian could react, the hooligans turned the helium into buzzlight bottles.Then SaTURN, with all the hooligans on it, started falling sideways. The terrrerian and the buzzlight fairy, who was with him, chased SaTURN. Because SaTURN was falling sideways, it crashed into Uranus, Neptune and Pluto. Out of the disproportionate mush of planets the terrrerian and the buzzlight fairy saw the trapped hooligans.
“I got it!” said the buzzlight fairy, racing towards the hooligans.
No, I’ll do it, telecommunicated the terrrerian, speeding up. The terrrerian raced the buzzlight fairy to the hooligans but the terrrerian took them out of the planets first with a net.
I told you I could do it, the terrrerian thought.
“This time, my attempt will work,” said the buzzlight fairy.
The terrrerian and the buzzlight fairy went to MarZ next. There, the buzzlight fairy tried to put a zombie mask on a hooligan, but the hooligan kept resisting. Finally, when the buzzlight fairy was able to put the mask on the hooligan, the other hooligans turned the mask into buzzlight bottles.
See? I told you it wouldn’t work, the terrrerian communicated telepathically.
“Why don’t we work together? It might work, ”said the buzzlight fairy defeatedly.
Fine, the terrrerian transmitted.
The buzzlight fairy and the terrrerian then created a plan. They were going to summon a magical warlock called Asmoth. To summon Asmoth, you place candles around an altar made of stone, place an axe on top of it and chant “htomnomsamusyberehi” three times. The thing about the axe is that it has a buzzlight bottle hidden inside it. When Asmoth is summoned, he will grab the axe and yell, “WHO SUMMONED ME?” When the hooligans see Asmoth pick up the axe, they will start attacking him. Then Asmoth will get angry at the hooligans and destroy them.
It was time to put their plan into action.The terrrerian and the buzzlight fairy set up the altar and brought all the hooligans to it.Then they put the axe on the altar and chanted the word three times. Then they flew away to a safe distance.They saw a tornado of axes which then disappeared, with Asmoth the warlock in its place.
“WHO SUMMONED ME?!” inquired Asmoth. He then picked up the axe. The hooligans attacked him. From the distance that the terrrerian and the buzzlight fairy could only see explosions of dust and massive mushroom clouds. Then they heard Asmoth say “I AM ASMOTH THE WARLOCK,YAS YAS YAS!” before his shape blurred, and disappeared. When they inspected MarZ they saw that the whole planet was no longer there. Another planet had been destroyed. Now the only planets left were Earth,Venus,and MerCUREy.
“Guess my job’s done here,” said the buzzlight fairy.
“See you around,” thought the terrrerian.
“Bye,” said the buzzlight fairy.
Then the buzzlight fairy disappeared in a puff of smoke. The hooligans were gone forever.
Or were they…?
One month after the disintegration of the hooligans, the terrrerian was on a beach walking past a tree. He kicked a rock at it. The rock hit the tree. Unluckily for the terrrerian, that tree was a palm tree. Palm trees have leaves filled with greenify potion, which is what makes them green. Normally, this wouldn’t have any effect on anything, but because of the Earth’s brief moment as a sponge marshmallow planet, the palm trees, which become super absorbent around sponge marshmallows, retain their sponge-marshmallow-like insides. The combination of the vibration of the rock hitting the tree, the sponge marshmallow minerals, and the greenify potion create a silent propulsion system for the palm tree. The palm tree then silently rocketed into the atmosphere, without the terrrerian noticing a thing.
As the tree zoomed past Earth, it passed the previous location of MarZ. The sponge marshmallow, which is a superabsorbent material, absorbed the disintegrated hooligans. The palm tree rocket would have crashed into Venus, but because Venus is made of iron and rock, which boost the effects of greenify potion, the palm tree rocket blasted straight through the center of Venus, leaving a cylindrical hole in the middle of it. Then the rocket, burning through the last of its greenify potion fuel, crashed into MerCUREy. The minerals on MerCUREy started to cure the hooligans of their death, reviving them.The hooligans combined with the palm tree, the sponge marshmallows, and the last of the greenify potion. The hooligans combined into one hooligan who could jump higher, was immune to greenify potion, and was extremely smart. The hooligan didn’t want to smash buzzlight or buzzlight bottles anymore.
The terrrerian, oblivious to the fact that he caused the resurrection of the hooligans, turned around towards the glimmering ocean and saw out of the corner of his eye the empty place where the palm tree should be. Then the terrrerian thought Wasn’t there a tree there? Then the terrrerian kept on walking.
Two days later…
For the past two days, the hooligan had been working on a way to escape the nonexistent atmosphere of MerCUREy. The hooligan cooled the small amounts of hydrogen, helium, and oxygen in the air until they became a liquid. Then the hooligan put the liquids in a bowl and mixed it with the merCUREic sand. This created a gigantifier. The hooligan consumed part of the mixture and grew to the size of ten giraffes. Then he jumped to earth (with his super jump ability) and started to smash everything. The hooligan left smashed trees and upturned grass in his wake. Then the hooligan did something terrible. The hooligan combined the nitrogen in earth’s atmosphere with the merCUREic mixture he had, and threw the mixture to the moon. This caused the moon to enter a sped up orbit, making the moon go into a solar eclipse. Because the moon used all of its orbital energy in those five seconds, the moon couldn’t move for the next 100 years. That meant there was a solar eclipse for the next 100 years. MWAHAHAHA!!!
The eclipse was the first thing the terrrerian noticed. Then the terrrerian heard the smashing of trees and grass.
“TERRRERIAN,” said a voice.”I’M COMING FOR YOU!”
The terrrerian saw a massive figure stomping toward him. Then, he saw the figure was a hooligan, combined with greenify potion and palm tree wood. Then the terrrerian realized what he had done. The terrrerian realized that kicking the rock against the palm tree caused it to rocket into space and collect the hooligan dust. The terrrerian realized that the palm tree rocket landed on MerCUREy and revived the hooligans. The terrrerian realized that this was all his fault.
The terrrerian needed to defeat this monstrosity. He teleported to Potiona and back and threw a greenify potion at it, but the hooligan absorbed it and only seemed to grow more powerful. Then the hooligan picked up a star from earth’s sky and smushed it in his hand. He poured the starjuice on another star that he picked up. This made a starbomb that would explode and suck all the air out of earth’s atmosphere.
“I HAVE A STARBOMB,WHICH WILL SUCK OUT ALL THE AIR OF EARTH’S ATMOSPHERE,” the hooligan said. “IT WILL EXPLODE IN three… two… one.”
The bomb exploded and there was a blinding flash of light.Then all the air was sucked out of earth’s atmosphere.The terrrerian saw the plants withering, and turning brown.
Somewhere, somewhen, there was a Star-god. Star-god envisioned the hooligan exploding a starbomb, with the terrrerian standing frightened in the background. I must help this being, the Star-god thought before he teleported to the terrrerian.
The terrrerian turned around and saw a blinding flash of yellow light.
“I am Star-god. I am here to help you,” said the Star-god.
Then the terrrerian and the Star-god started fighting the hooligan. First, the terrrerian built a missile made of maple syrup and shot it at the hooligan, but the hooligan grew stronger and absorbed the maple syrup. Then the sun god tried to ignite a mini star and throw it at the hooligan,but the star couldn’t ignite because there was no oxygen. Then the terrrerian used a return-oxygenizer 5,000 to return the oxygen to earth, but he accidentally returned 5,000 times as much as there was before. Because there was 5,000 times as much oxygen, all the spiders became huge. Then the terrrerian saw his best spider friend Aragag.
“Aragag!” the terrrerian called. ”It’s been so long.”
“Terrrerian!” Aragag greeted. ”How are… BLEEEH!”Aragag said as he barfed on the hooligan’s shoes.
“HEY!” the hooligan said. “THOSE WERE MY NEW SHOES!”
The hooligan, in a fit of rage, lifted his foot to stomp on Aragag, but Aragag was quick. Aragag shot a web at him, but the web wasn’t strong enough. Then the Star-god extracted hydrogen from a star and coated the web with it. Then the Star-god lit the rope on fire, so if the hooligan struggled, he would get burnt. Then Aragag shot the hooligan at the moon. The hooligan flew into the moon, Venus and MurCUREy, sending all three planets hurtling into the sun with the hooligan. When the moon went into the sun, the sun absorbed the moon which caused the sun to send out a radioactive shrinkamatronization asteroid that fell on earth, which caused all the spiders to shrink and caused the oxygen level to return to normal.
The hooligan was never seen again.