“And as soon as he was there, he started digging as fast as he could, and then he quickly covered up the hole. As soon as you could say, ‘Spaghetti on bread,’ night fell. The lion started reading the seed stories and sang it songs. He didn’t get a wink of sleep.”
A young lion, Egghead, was already a leader of his tribe and was so thirsty, but he couldn’t find any lakes.
The lion Egghead set out to find water, but wherever he went, he couldn’t find water.
He came across a zebra and asked the zebra if he knew where to find water.
“In this juicy patch of grass you will find water,” the zebra replied.
Then, for some weird reason, he saw…
A giraffe with a blueberry!!
Just so you know, blueberries were very rare on this side of the world. And they’re the juiciest fruits ever, in my opinion.
And the giraffe had the biggest blueberry ever!!
Egghead woke him up and said, “Hi, do you think I could have some of that blueberry?”
“No, I have a big family,” said the giraffe. “I need to share it with my two grandpas, two grandmas, my wife, three nephews, and two nieces! I’m almost tired just writing to them!”
But even if the giraffe did give Egghead the blueberry, he would have to share it with his two grandpas. “Ugh!” Egghead hated sharing with people. So, he asked, “Where did you find it?”
“I did not find it. I planted it,” the giraffe replied. “Do you know what I will do? I will give you the seed of this blueberry, and it will grow in a few hours.”
“Wow,” Egghead said “When can I have it?”
“Now,” said the giraffe, as he plucked out the seed. The lion immediately leapt on him and grabbed the seed from him and quickly said thank you.
Grinning, he ran away happily looking at his new prize. He ran home as fast as he could, and the minute he came home, he went to his garden as fast as his muscular legs could carry him.
And as soon as he was there, he started digging as fast as he could, and then he quickly covered up the hole. As soon as you could say, “Spaghetti on bread,” night fell. The lion started reading the seed stories and sang it songs. He didn’t get a wink of sleep.
As fast as night fell, morning came. He was sleeping so hard, so the women lions had to hunt instead of him. When he woke up, the women lions were all mad at him.
One said, “Why in the world were you not awake? We had to do all the work.”
“So do you still believe in that useless legend?” asked the women lions.
“Why did you call the legend useless?” asked the Egghead, now raising his voice.
“We, the mighty lions, respect the legend. You don’t dare insult the lion who was the first ever lion on earth. That’s why you are alive now. Because she produced babies — that’s why you are alive,” said the lion whose name was Egghead the Strong.
He liked his family, but inside his head he was thinking, Why has the seed not grown?
But secretly, the blueberry was growing right in his garden, of course, so he decided to check on it. When he got there, he saw that it was too big to keep there, so he cut the blueberry with his razor sharp teeth and divided it into small parts and ate one piece of the blueberry. The women lions were doing their gardening. One of the lions went to check on him, and when she saw the blueberry, she was obviously thrilled and went to fetch the other lions.
The other lions came, one by one, and had the same feeling as the first lion who saw the blueberry. They all tried to dive at the blueberry, but the male lion punched and kicked in each of the female lion’s face, and they tumbled down the hill, all of them black and blue.
Egghead swung himself onto a tree and scraped off a ton of bark, so he could make a fence strong enough to hold a lot of lions and high enough so they couldn’t spy on him. So, back to the story: Egghead had a lot of skills — he tossed the bark into the the air and kicked them into different places. He was screaming, “Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee,” and finally landed. The women lions watched in disgust and soon retreated.
Egghead karate-chopped the air in triumph. He started walking to the Muffin Montoy, the best place to get muffins, and on the way he met Bring the bird who was always traveling around the world.
He asked, “Where are you going, Egghead the strong?”
“I am going to the Muffin Montoy,” Egghead the Strong replied.
So, Egghead finally arrived at the Muffin Montoy, but just when got there, he froze in fear. His biggest archenemy, Engonto the Terrifying, was at the the gate of the Muffin Montoy, stealing muffins from the other animals.
“If you steal in the Muffin Montoy, you go to jail,” Egghead the Strong said, bravely. “Or I unleash my little pet dragon.”
Engonto was now slowing down from all the muffins he had eaten.
“Oh, and you might be sent to the principal,” Egghead said, chewing a pickle and drinking water. “Oh, and also muffins are ubiquitous in the Muffin Montoy world, even in the bathroom.”
Egghead the Strong was feeling very active and wanted to help all the animals and stop Engonto from stealing from the Muffin Montoy. He was making them run out of muffins and draining them out of business.
So, Egghead the Strong decided to whistle out strongly to the speedy snake jailers who would lock him up, but Egghead the Strong needed evidence. So, he took his lean mean freezing machine and froze Engonto and all his muffins.
By the time the speedy snake jailers arrived and saw him, they sneered, “Well, poor little Engonto the Sneaky isn’t so sneaky after all.” And they took him away.
Egghead laughed and ordered the jazz muffin, his favorite muffin ever, and proudly went home singing happily “The Muffin Man.”
He finally reached home very happily, but found the women lions were not there. Egghead found this super peculiar. He figured out that the women lions had started their tree fiber afternoon weaving, and he knew that he was right because they wouldn’t be doing anything else. And he was surprisingly right because he hadn’t memorized the women lions’ schedule of what day they would do that day and what day they would take a break.
It was very hectic because half the time he knew where the women lions were and what they would be doing.
Today was his birthday, and the date was January 25th, 2028, and he was turning 17, so this was his final year of school. After school, he would be heading into college for 12 years because Egghead was doing many courses like fighting, being a doctor, and the course he was most looking forward in college was the secret agent course because he would learn to spy and do many other things, but also the secret agent course was four more courses thought.
So, he eventually found his partner, and he liked his partner, so he built phones for both of them even though they both knew how to make phones.
One day, he was whispering to his partner, and his partner told him that Engonto had broken out of jail… luckily, he got his partner’s message.
Just then he realized something — he didn’t know his partner’s name. So, he called him up and asked him what his name was.
“Slick!” his partner replied.
Today was the big day because he was heading for college, so he started to run fast. He ran nine miles by the time he took a bite of his blueberry and went to sleep.
He had a weird dream that the giraffe was very evil and was trying to kill him. He suddenly awoke with a start, sweating like crazy. He decided that now that he was awake he should get going so he would reach there earlier, but something was stopping him. He thought he didn’t have enough courage to go on, but he was wrong as usual.
He had recently discovered that a big, ugly, fat bee was so close to him. He decided to swat the big, ugly, fat bee, so he still missed, but he was very happy because the big, ugly, fat bee had gone away.
So, he started back on his journey to the Capital. While he was walking, he met his partner, Slick, and asked how far they were from college. He groaned. Slick the Hyena seemed very surprised.
Slick said, “Why, we’re only 900 feet away. Hahahahahahahahahahaha. You’re wrong. Hey, that’s really weird.”
“What’s really weird?” Egghead whispered.
“Egghead, some warts are on your skin,” said Slick. “Oh, and why are you spinning dude?” whispered Slick, confused.
They finally reached The Cats College. First, they signaled to the guards. Then, they walked through the heavy iron doors at the back of the castle.
Clang clang clang clong clang, the huge bells went, as the time turned 12:00 AM.
“Yay, it’s lunch time. Oh yeah, because I get muffins,” exclaimed Egghead.
After they entered the iron doors, they saw a miraculous sight — a bunch of eagles swooping down and dive-bombing at least 100 pigs. But Egghead had two majestic black eagles of his own: a male and a female who were about to have babies.
But black eagles are the rarest and most powerful eagles, at least as big as five of the other eagles. So, Egghead let them loose — they made a deafening skreeleech!
All the eagles stopped to look at the eagles, but because eagles can’t hover, they fell down, down, down into complete darkness.
A fire ball came down into the pit right after the eagles.
A few hours later…
Slick and Egghead were still exploring the huge castle. While they were exploring, they found a lot of eagle nests.
There were so many chicks with so many mother and father eagles, so as soon as they saw Egghead and Slick, they shooed them away like tiny flies.
He stumbled upon something. It was a round, hard map preserved in clear plaster for hundreds, no, maybe thousands of years. Before he could do anything, the lunch bell rang.