Let It Out

Kuqa was a young girl. Her mother had died last year when she was five So Kuqa only had her father. Most people couldn’t pronounce her name and she never had any friends. Kuqa in Albanian meant red. Kuqa’s mother was Albanian. Kuqa had not said a word ever since Roze (her mother) died. 

“Kuqa, it’s time for breakfast,” David (her father) said. Kuqa went to take her plate. It was Llakuma me eurocream. That was Kuqa’s favorite. Kuqa was homeschooled.

“Are you excited for school?” David asked. Kuqa nodded. She quite liked homeschooling. Kuqa gobbled up her Llakuma and then went to play with her dolls. Her dolls were from her mother. Kuqa named them Lulu and Nina. They were her favorite toys. She made them have a tea party with tiny plastic teacups. Kuqa had nothing to do most of the time. Before Roze died, they would go outside and play on the swings. But now Kuqa was an introvert and going outside just made her sad. 

           Kuqa walked up to the living room and pointed at a book. She knew how to read but not well so her father picked up the book and read to her. 

          “Once upon a time, there was a prince named Ocelius, he was a rude person who would judge everyone. One day, an old woman walked up to him, she said she wanted to give him some chocolates. The prince laughed and laughed then the woman turned him into a fly and stole all of his gold,” David read. Kuqa giggled, she loved that story. David kissed her good night and Kuqa went to sleep. 

Kuqa woke up at 6:00. She had a bad dream. She saw David sitting on the couch wide awake. 

“Come here,” David said. Kuqa walked toward the couch. 

“Do you like the idea of going to school?” David asked. Kuqa looked at David like he was crazy. 

“It’s just that you’d be so much smarter if you go, and I want you to learn in the best way possible,” David said. Kuqa didn’t want to go to school but she nodded yes because she knew if she said no, it wouldn’t work anyway. 

“And besides, you’ll have all your old friends there,” David explained. Kuqa thought for a moment. Her old friends, Lilly and Charlie, probably forgot her. Kuqa went back to her room to sleep for another hour. She had a nightmare. In the nightmare, she was in school. Everybody judged her because she didn’t talk.

David woke Kuqa up at 7:00. Kuqa was confused.

“Come on, get ready for school!” David said. Kuqa put on the backpack and ran to the bus. She was terrified. She saw Lilly. 

“Kuqa?” someone asked. It was Lilly. Lilly remembered her? Lilly ran to hug her. 

“How are you doing?” Lilly asked. Kuqa tried to respond but she couldn’t. She was too sad to talk. Then Charlie came. 

“Oh my god! It’s really you!” Charlie yelled with excitement. Kuqa hugged him. Lilly was confused by Kuqa not responding. She used to talk all day. Charlie seemed to expect a “hi” as well, but Kuqa just couldn’t say anything. Kuqa started crying. She was thinking about her mother. Kuqa cried very often. Lilly and Charlie were now SUPER confused. They gave Kuqa some space.  

She sat with Lilly on the bus ride. Lilly gave Kuqa a piece of paper and a pen.

“You’re not talking so maybe you can write why you’re so upset?” Lilly said. Kuqa wrote about Roze dying. This made Lilly stop talking to Kuqa. Lilly realized how sad Kuqa was. Lilly whispered something to Charlie. Kuqa knew what she said, it was that her mother died because Charlie looked at Kuqa with a sad look. 

Kuqa finally got to school where she saw her new teacher, Mrs. Lockerton. Mrs. Lockerton looked like a ghost with a very pale face, red cheeks, and a bunch of mascara. Kuqa tried to stay away from her. Kuqa saw the other teachers bring the new kids and make them introduce themselves. Kuqa had a piece of paper and a pen. She thought that Mrs. Lockerton would introduce Kuqa to the class.

“Class, bring out your books. It’s time to read,” Mrs. Lockerton explained. A boy was wearing a shirt with a stain on it. 

“Harold, didn’t I tell you that people in this class should wear good clothing!” Mrs. Lockerton yelled. 

“Sorry, Mrs. Lockerton!” Harold said with a scared look on his face. Mrs. Lockerton slapped the boy across the face. Kuqa did not like her teacher. 

It was time for lunch. Kuqa had a PB & J for lunch. She ate it fast. After lunch, it was time for recess. Kuqa hung out with Lilly. They talked to each other on a piece of paper. Kuqa wrote about her teacher and how crazy she was. Lilly laughed. 

“I heard she is a witch and that she kills children. Is that true?” Lilly asked. Mrs. Lockerton obviously wasn’t a witch so Kuqa started laughing. Lilly laughed with her. Kuqa realized that this was the first time she’d laughed since her mom died. Kuqa started to get a little sadder from thinking about her mom. Lilly noticed that she was sad.

“Do you think you need therapy?” Lilly asked. Kuqa wrote, maybe. Kuqa actually never thought about therapy. She thought of trying it. 

Dismissal came and Kuqa ran to the car. Kuqa wrote a note to her dad about trying therapy. David looked at her. 

“You want to try it?” David asked. Kuqa nodded yes. David smiled. Kuqa went home pretty happy. She almost talked but she still couldn’t do it. After trying and trying to talk, Kuqa got frustrated. She cried in the middle of the night. David woke up extremely tired. 

“What is it, honey?” David asked. Kuqa just didn’t know how to respond. She kept crying. She wasn’t mute, so why couldn’t she talk? 

“Red, red, you’ll be okay, you’ll talk one day,” David said. Red was David’s nickname for Kuqa. Of course, that was what Kuqa meant in Albanian. Kuqa hugged David hard. Harder than ever before. He always made her feel so much better. 

“Why don’t you sleep with Nina tonight?” David asked playfully. David picked up the doll. Kuqa grabbed it tight from his hands. She slept with the doll all night. 

She woke up at 6:00 am. She had time to eat her breakfast and brush her teeth (unlike last time). She was going to start therapy the next day. David told her it was culture day. Kuqa had to wear something in her culture. She looked through the closet. She saw the Albanian dress that Roze gave her. She stared at it. It had the Albanian eagle and some little flowers on it. Kuqa didn’t wear that dress since Roze died. Then she saw another thing in the closet — Roze’s scarf. It had the Kosovo flag on it. It was a little big for Kuqa but she decided to wear the scarf along with the dress. She went to the school bus. Lilly and Charlie saved a seat for her. 

“Nice dress, where is it from?” Charlie asked. Kuqa thought about it being from her mom. She shed a tear and ran to a different seat. Lilly punched Charlie in the stomach. She sat with Kuqa. Kuqa didn’t scream like usual but she was shedding tears so much. 

“I’m sorry about Charlie. He didn’t mean to make you sad,” Lilly explained. Kuqa nodded. “I think I know why you’re not talking. You want to keep in the feelings of your mom dying but you can’t. Some advice — let things out, you’ll feel better,” Lilly said. Kuqa wanted to know if this was true but she couldn’t just scream in class. She was going to see if that was true when she saw the therapist. The therapist knew best. Kuqa hugged Lilly. After a couple of minutes, they arrived at the school. Mrs. Lockerton was wearing a shirt with a Catalan flag. Mrs. Lockerton also had snakes on her pants so Kuqa was confused if she was Catalan or from somewhere else. 

“Bye, Kuqa!” Lilly waved. Kuqa waved back. Kuqa walked to her classroom. There was a kid with an Italian leather jacket. There was a kid with a scarf that said FRANCE, three other kids, and of course, there was Mrs. Lockerton. Kuqa guessed the other kids were sick or something.

“You might be wondering why barely anyone is here. It’s because the people that are gone wore better clothes. You guys didn’t. Your punishment is this,” Mrs. Lockerton said. 

“Mrs. Lockerton, where are you from?” Harold asked.

“I’m from Belarus, it shows the flag. Stupid child,” Mrs. Lockerton answered rudely. 

“No, that’s the flag of Catalonia,” Harold said. Mrs. Lockerton walked toward him and brought out a stick. She hit him. Harold started crying and then she hit him again. Then Mrs. Lockerton walked to Kuqa.

“What’s the two-headed eagle on the dress?” Mrs. Lockerton asked. Kuqa still couldn’t answer.

“What is it!?” Mrs. Lockerton screamed. Mrs. Lockerton was about to hit Kuqa with the stick but then…

“Stop!” Kuqa yelled. That was the first time in a year that she’d talked. A couple of the kids stared at Kuqa so surprised.

“It’s the Albanian eagle, my family is from Kosovo,” Kuqa explained. Mrs. Lockerton didn’t care. She hit Kuqa and sent her home. David picked her up. Kuqa got into the smelly car where David was probably gonna yell at her. 

“I heard you talked,” David said. 

“Yeah,” Kuqa responded. David smiled. He didn’t yell at Kuqa, surprisingly.

“How did you do it?” David asked. 

“I let my sadness out,” Kuqa explained while smiling.

“I love you,” David said. He kissed Kuqa’s forehead. 

                                                            THE END.

                                                               Afterward-

I want people to learn that you should always let your sad feelings out because it would make you feel so much better. So I wrote this story so people would do that and because I wanted to show Albanian culture to people. Kuqa was so sad she couldn’t talk, and when she let her feelings out, she talked, and I know you can do the same.

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