Hamburgler

by Ranja Andria, age 10
Hamburgler Ranja is 10 years old. He is the King of T-Shirts.

“So he arranged for one of his henchmen to steal a monster truck so he could drive over the electric fence. Then he put his plan in motion.”

Ronald McDonald wanted all kids to have free burgers. He wanted kids to have a better life than him. He was going to rob the hamburger factory and steal the burger making machine so in his illegal burger factory he can make burgers for free and sell them to kids. Ronald McDonald was a prison escapee and he was already a fugitive. He wanted kids to like him, so that future grownups would like him. The way he would make kids like him is by giving kids free hamburgers.

So he immediately began creating a plan. The first step of his plan would be to go to the burger factory at night, make sure there was nobody inside, and if there was anybody inside he would make a distraction by breaking glass on one side of the factory while entering on the other side. Once he got inside and got near the burger machine, he would incapacitate whoever was inside the burger factory and carefully but quickly take the burger machine into his getaway car, and drive off into the night. When he was about to carry out his plan, he noticed one major flaw to his plan. There was an electric fence around the factory. So he arranged for one of his henchmen to steal a monster truck so he could drive over the electric fence. Then he put his plan in motion.

He drove over the electric fence hearing a scary noise that sounded like nails on a chalkboard. He scaled up to the roof and looked in through one of the windows. He saw two employees and one armed guard. He made a loud thump on the roof by dropping a brick from his hands onto the roof. Then he slid down to look at the window. He looked in the window and saw that the guard had stood in front of the burger making machine while the two employees started to turn on the security systems. While this was happening, he broke the glass and slid onto a catwalk in the factory on the catwalk was a insane hobo. But Rian was not important. From the catwalk he carefully dropped some tear gas through a vent. He knew he would go through all of the vents but he only needed to go through one, the one that was right behind the guard. He covered his nose and mouth and waited until the gas cleared.

He saw that the guard was still there but unconscious. He carefully tied up the guard and gagged him. Unluckily, he had used too much rope swinging down from the catwalk that he didn’t leave enough to tie his gag on, but that was good enough. He carefully placed him facedown. He grabbed the rope and hope he’d brought specifically for hooking onto the hamburger machine, ran outside, tied it to the monster truck, and drove off. Once he was about 100 feet away from the factory, he put it on the monster truck and kept on driving.

When he was back to his lair, he immediately tried to use the burger machine, but it turned out that it had to be connected to a certain WiFi source for it to actually work. He didn’t want to go back, so he fiddled around with it and tried to hack the system. After hours and hours of hopelessly hacking, he got to an almost. He almost figured out that it could be assigned to a network. He found that he’d have to move it around, so he’d have to connect it to a cellular network, but he couldn’t connect it to a cellular network because everything he used was being tracked, and he could only get old electronics.

So he went back to the factory and he looked in all the windows from all angles and saw that inside of it, there was the WiFi generator. So he quickly stole the terminal. He picked it up and ran all the way to his lair. He plugged in the WiFi. It worked. But then another problem was that you also needed to get the buns, the meat, the cheese, the tomato, and all the other toppings you would want.

So we went out on a trip. He rented a farm. He invested on getting lots of tomatoes and meat and everything, but using a fake identity, Hercules Achilles, with the farm. Finally, with all the materials, he rented a 24-wheeler and brought it back to his lair. At his lair he quickly tossed all of the materials in the back storage unit of the lair and he connected it with a pipe to the hamburger machine.

So he invited kids to a building he rented and he used another fake identity, Barney Music, and earned a lot of money giving kids free hamburgers. The parents don’t have to pay him, but they pay him because he’s feeding their kids for free.

Ronald felt like the president needed his burgers. So he started to make a plan to put a burger in the president’s office.His plan was to climb over the fence and peer into the oval office then, he would use the vents to get to the sewer and emerge on the street and drive away. So once he got to the white house he noticed one big flaw there was a taco fight. The ground looked like a dead fish carcass.

Ronald decided to use the sewer. He climbed into the sewer and looked for the pipe named economy, economy was the codename for the white house strangely there was an old pizza box. Ronald entered the vent system looking for the oval office. He was crawling through the vents on his belly pulling himself along with his elbows when he finally reached the oval office and saw a camera, he noticed that the was only one camera and it was only recording the balcony so he elbowed open the grate and placed the burger on the desk and placed a note on the desk with his calling information.

Suddenly the camera faced him and immediately an alarm went off. Secret service immediately blockaded all the doors with over flowing trash cans and started to yell, “Hands on the back of your head and face the wall.” He heard the men enter the office as quick as speeding car he rolled two smoke grenades and quickly but quietly jumped into the vent and escaped into the sewer from there he could sprint, he sprinted as fast as he could. Running all the way to the ladder to the surface. And drove off into the night.

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